what kind of beast would turn its life into words?

what atonement is this all about?

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23 February 1993
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i'm just a human who is trying to learn how to be kinder to other humans...and i think, since my journal is largely flocked, it's high time i use this space to actually say something about me.

my senior year of college looms ahead of me at sarah lawrence, and i'm trying to meet it with at least a vague attempt at grace and humor. i am currently maintaining that upon graduation i will locate a discreet closet in which to hide all summer, only to magically reappear in time for the next fall semester (so much for grace), but if that plan doesn't work out, i might just go to library school. i want to help people in the only way i know how, basically. i'm not gifted at teaching, and being a social worker sounds like my personal idea of hell, so i want to help people access information freely and abundantly. i also tend to get anxious if i'm in a room with too few books (or windows, actually--i am seriously neurotic), so i like to think that a library, as the antithesis of a bookless room, will make me so desperately unanxious that i reach a bookish kind of nirvana.

or something to that general effect. i never do know what i'm going to say in these things. i'm a humorless feminist killjoy, a lesbian with a boyfriend, white, upper-middle-class, cisgendered, flirting with socialism but honestly too ill informed (thus far) about economics to call myself a socialist yet, a recovering alcoholic, a reptile-owner (or, as i like to call it, "dragon-keeper"), and a human being, sometimes, on occasion, depending on who i'm talking to. i'm also a person with ptsd and depression, and i talk about those things a lot, so beware of triggers. i've been told by people i love a lot to call myself a poet, but i don't know about that one yet.

ponchogoblins made my moodtheme, and my awesome wonderful lovely t.s. eliot layout was made by scholarslayouts.

shelved, dogeared, well loved, spoken, & ravished.

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